So for all those arseholes talking about my grammer I just want to say stick it where it feels lekker my friends ...my grammer has never been the best side of my face and I can like to like it like that! So here I am camping and looking like shit....I think most people at work will run a mile if they see me like I am today but I do not care because my husband is still around - however barely I must say and I do believe he will not last longer than tomorrow ... which means tomorrow I will have to look pretty again .. the shackles that women have to bare in the pursuit of happiness! Anyway we had Nykita's birthday party on the 25th and if I thought that there is nothing worse than parenting to make me feel completely incompetent and like the most evil person on earth I was wrong - have a party for your kid at your home which will result in a lot of kids coming together at your home from all ages and cultures and sizes with various different needs from taking Ritalin at a specific time to not eating cake but needing some other funny thing that you do not have in your house - THEN we are talking the master moment of all incompetent moments only then will you start appreciating your work from 9-5 with every ounce in your tired body! You are then clamped by a mother fear that your kid is surrounded by funny creatures and then the calmness comes knowing that this is just life and these are just kids that will all grow up eventually becoming individual adults that contributes to all of this chaos in their own little way - never the less what a humbling moment it was for me running around and chasing after other people's kids. So then on the 26th I decided to make soup for the first time in my 36years on this planet earth - I hand picked all the ingredients ( in the shop for those of you that think I might have run in some field picking the shit) then listened carefully to the advice of my mother and then started cooking until I looked like shit!(which has not changed until now by the way) It came out ok and I plan to become the master soup maker before 40 but my worst moment was that I did not freeze the soup so when busy setting up camp I looked and saw the cooler box standing in the sun and realized there is no way those butter beans would have made it ...walked over and understood that this is the moment that I have to let go of all my hard work for one whole day and put it in the dustbin and try again another day - my heart was broken and I believe I will never be the same again - reading my husbands blog the moment for him was a lot more trivial than for me so I have to get over THAT as well! So here we are camping in the magalies at a place called Umaramba nice but I cannot help but feeling something is missing - maybe by the end of the lazy days here I will be able to tell you maybe it is summer , maybe it is my soup , I do not know.....There is not a lot of people here but still you find you stereotype campers - the two old people taking a break from their retirement ..up before anybody else has even thought about anything that made sence , the young couple in love having probably the most awesome sex in their little excuse of a tent, the camp DJ playing songs which I can hear in a distance making me feel like somebody else is having more fun than me...and then the couples with kids ..crying and faffing around the kids like us, kitted out and staring into space when they have a wee moment tired and NOT having sex in their BIG caravan because it is too cold and they are toooooo tired! ( I am lying it is NOT THAT bad) but you can see your middle aged people are keeping the economy together we all look like shit (maybe I must just say beauty I understand is in the eye of the beholder so I clearly am aware of what that says about me). From the 25th to the 27th I have not felt sexy for one second of the day and soo wish that I did but while I am going thru my own shit my kids are running around looking like they have energy enough for Africa and for a life time full of stuff to happen to them and this makes me happy. Most of my favourite memories are from camping and I know we are making some nice ones for them too now... in this moment here today at Umaramba....by the way 3G is like a dog that stalks you always there and you KNOW it...you are always connected and the rest of the world knows it too (like Mr Gibson saying I am a fly by night! and then of course the people at work ) so sometimes you just want to be not connected....but you are and yet when you are lonely and wanting to just interact with something there it is ready and waiting to keep you company....I will speak again tomorrow ..I am now listening to the DJ in the far distance and thinking about the cold night ahead knowing the young couple behind us will probably have sex in their excuse of a tent while myself and Jacques just try to survive the cold - will I survive it -we'll see?